Maybe you know someone like Thomas. Thomas is actually quite nice and we would actually recommend him to all our single women. But it doesn’t really have to be right for a relationship. We took a strategic look with Thomas at how he can build a relationship. From the strategy, the funnel, the tactics, the campaigns, to the individual offers and goals for each phase. And lo and behold, it works. Along the marketing automation canvas, we show the funnel to build a relationship.

Drawing attention to yourself is no problem

Like all of us, Thomas knows what attracts people online, what brings in traffic, so to speak. Here are some simple rules for getting attention. As in business, on Google and social media, everyone is playing with the same tricks. Depending on the context, everyone is trying to do more or less the same thing online. In Thomas’ Tinder context, this means:

  • Holding up a cat or puppy
  • Poses with attractiveness, pleasure or luxury items

I call it the 4M tactic: Mietz-Muskeln-Merlot-Maserati. This tactic works really well for Thomas at first.

But then, when it goes one step further? When it comes to building a relationship and progressing through the marketing funnel? Then you just have to show your colors. Then things look different again. In the case of Thomas: If the date asks about the Mietz, and it turns out that he’s actually allergic and only lasted 3 seconds for the photo… Well, what can I say. You know the answer. Not a good start for a potential relationship.

Thomas has realized this in the meantime and now lures more with the real Thomas than with fake pussycats. And lo and behold, the lured ones now last longer in the funnel. Thomas had to make a few strategic considerations for this realization.

To do this, we created a relationship funnel with Thomas. Now it is also clearer to him what he wants to achieve and he can act more purposefully in every interaction.

Shaping the first date, the first interaction

The first step is all about taking the first step – so don’t go ahead with the marriage proposal on the first date, don’t take the potential in-laws with you, etc.

Everyone knows that’s what it’s all about anyway. In business, we also know that ultimately it’s about collaboration. The relationship is then built up further via the funnel. But the first step is to check whether it could fit at all.

So, communicate a value proposition but do not yet demand a major commitment.

In the case of our Thomas, what he has to offer is a calm, reliable partner who enjoys being out and about in nature.

Then Thomas shouldn’t pretend and offer a date with an adrenaline rush. That’s not Thomas. Thomas is: A walk along the lake to a bistro. And then it either works or it doesn’t. Because the important thing here is not just that Thomas quickly pushes a step towards a partnership, but above all: getting to know and filtering.

Getting to know and filtering the other person

How often have I said to Thomas: Take a look at her first, think about whether she suits you before you take the next step.

We know this from business: of course we all want to get ahead, but we also know that not every customer is ours.

So what needs to be done? Find out more about the person in order to decide whether and how to proceed. Sounds banal, but unfortunately it often gets lost in the rush. And the relationship suffers even before it begins.

We and Thomas have two options here: observe and ask.

If Thomas were to work with Aivie, he could, for example, observe which of Thomas’ pages his date looks at and deduce what interests her more or less.

Thomas could also play questions at the right moment. I tell Thomas that all the time: Just ask them! For example, if your potential date agrees to meet you, it could look like this: Test it out for yourself and see what happens!

Just ask…

…that’s how Thomas does it. Curious about what comes next? Fill out the form and see what happens!

Test it yourself

Designing the further phases in the funnel

Thomas has to keep at it. After all, anyone who expects the other person to fall around their neck forever after the first date is simply expecting too much. There is still more or less a long way to go. After the first step, Thomas also has to take the next step.

Funnel logic is basically always about taking the next best step. Our counterpart shows us when the time has come. We can recognize from certain triggers that the person is ready to go further with us along the funnel and wants to build a relationship.

In the case of Thomas, this means that if the dates go well, then it’s on to a weekend together. Here too, Thomas wants to offer what makes him special: hiking in the mountains. Both sides invest more time and there are new facets to experience for both sides. After the weekend together, both will be smarter!

In this way, a more and more complete profile is created step by step. And step by step, things progress and Thomas and his date build up a relationship. Thomas is also constantly learning in the process and makes adjustments to his tactics in the respective phase – and sometimes also to his counterpart.

Conclusion on building relationships with Funnels

The same rules apply to everyone online, everyone tries more or less the same tactics to attract attention.

As soon as you design the touchpoint, you have more opportunities to build a relationship, and you should take advantage of them: Observe, ask to learn and filter.

A strategy comes first. Be clear about what you want to achieve with the funnel and break it down into the individual phases.

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